Die Young

Here I am surrounded by beds

Covered in white, with people

Around me tinted in same

All I hear are voices

Wreathing in pain and agony

Driving my soul insane

Wrinkled faces

With meat hardly sticking to their bones

Wailing in hopes for finding relief

Stuck on the beds

With looks of disgrace

Image of that emergency room

Is imprinted on my mind

how life reaches there 

which started from the womb

Pushing me into a corner 

Instilling a fear, treating me unkind

I wanna die young

Does not matter how

does not matter when

I wanna die young

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Liebster Award

Lost Blue nominated me for this award. Thank you so much.

 Its amazing how well she writes. Her posts get you thinking and keep you hooked in the moment. You should definitely check out her blog.

https://lostblueblog.wordpress.com

My favorite blogger is Aashna, I like what she writes. Her words touch you in a thought provoking manner. They are precise and lead the reader to what she actually meant to write. I for one is in awe of her this particular piece “Rewind”. You all should check out her blog and find something for yourself like I did.

https://unfinishednightmare.wordpress.com

Here are my answers to questions asked by Lost Blue

Why did you start blogging?

I picked up writing as a way to vent out, it started out as an outlet and slowly turned into a hobby. I started the blog to see if I had what it takes and if possible can this be pursued as more than a hobby.

Do you think your writing style has changed over time?

Yes, I think that my writing style has changed a lot over time. Earlier I used to face difficulty in putting sentences together in a poetic sense.

Would you rather be rich or happy?

Happy.

How do you handle criticism?

I take criticism in a positive way and find it as an opportunity to improve and to explore myself further. Although, sometimes criticism gets to me but I treat it as a learning experience.

Do you feel empty?

Yes, I do. At times I get into this phase where I do not wish to remain in contact with people in my life.

Who is your favourite author? Why?

My favourite author would be Khaled Hosseini, I like his writing style and the way he narrates his stories. He gives a vivid and picturesque background of the scenes that stick with you long after the book is over. Following is a quote from one of his books that I absolutely love:

Cruelty and benevolence are but shades of same color

 

Have you ever destroyed something you wrote or any other form of art?

Not yet.

Would you categorize yourself as an extrovert or an introvert? Why?

I think of myself as an introvert who hides behind a flamboyant extroverted personality. My introverted behaviour has not been accepted in the past like I was hoping to so I make do with the way it goes.

Do you regret something? An action or a decision?

I regret a lot of things in my life actions and decisions included. 

What inspires you the most in my life?

I am hardly inspired. I am more of inspired by the moment kind of a person.

MY QUESTIONS ARE:

  1. What made you start the blog?
  2. Would you like to take your writing further?
  3. How well do you bond with your family?
  4. A nightmare that haunts you till date?
  5. How would you describe your life?
  6. If given a chance, which decision of your life would you undo? Why?
  7. Favourite singer?
  8. What are your views on growing dissent among various  religious beliefs in India?
  9. If you were to be anyone for a day, who would you be and why?
  10. What was your lowest point in life? How did you cope with it?

Rules:

  1. Thank the person who nominated you, and put a link to their blog on your blog. Try to include a little promotion for the person who nominated you. They will thank you for it and those who you nominate will also help you out as well.
  2. Display the award on your blog — by including it in your post and/or displaying it using a “widget” or a “gadget”. (Note that the best way to do this is to save the image to your own computer and then upload it to your blog post.)
  3. Write a 150-300 word post about your favorite blog that is not your own. Explain why you like the blog, provide links.
  4. Provide 10 random facts about yourself. (This year I’m making this optional. If you wish to engage with your readers it’s a great idea to include random facts about you.
  5. Nominate 5 – 11 blogs that you feel deserve the award, who have a less than 200 followers. (Note that you can always ask the blog owner this since not all blogs display a widget that lets the readers know this information!
  6. List these rules in your post (You can copy and paste from here or simply link to this post.) Once you have written and published it, you then have to.
  7. Inform the people/blogs that you nominated that they have been nominated for the Liebster award and provide a link for them to your post or mine (Jack Henry) if you don’t have all the information so that they can learn about it (they might not have ever heard of it!) Post a comment in the comments below (on the website https://theglobalaussie.com/blog/liebster-award-2017/ ) so I (Jack Henry) can view your post and check out your blog. I (Jack Henry)personally visit each and everyone.I (Jack Henry) visited a few hundred last year!!!

Sunday Morning

It’s a usual Sunday morning

With its usual Sunday routine

Took my time while having a bath

Now I stand in front of glass with a sheen

Picking my hair strand by strand 

Time-a luxury on my hand

And why shouldn’t I?

After all it’s my lazy Sunday morning

But what’s that I see

A different man in the mirror

Where it’s supposed to be me

I can’t see my innocent smile 

Or the kind eyes, which once loved all

In this heinous reflection that stands so tall

He just looks like me

Same hair, same eyes and same frickin’ teeth

This man in front of me lacks charm

With eyes of a predator looking to do harm

I am handsome in all my glory

He is bruised and damaged

With each stitch telling his story

I am amused and inspired by him

At the same time frightened of him

The boy on this side is just a shell

For the man on that side

Who’s been through hell

Not all of us have the luxury of being boys

Some just like me, become men

When they should be playing with toys

I set my hair to the perfect look

I stop and give my credulous smile

The reflection grins like a monster from a fairy book

We share looks of mutual respect for a while

Nothing’s new, it’s just my usual sunday morning

I learned it well

As a kid, I’ve watched my old man

Chop up wood for the fireplace

His tool was a streaking red axe

Gripping its wooden handle

He swung it around forth and back

Each blow, an accurate one 

Tearing the wood in two equal halves

He didn’t teach me but I learned it well

He took me to his lauded hunting trips

Shot some innocent animals

Stood and posed on its carcass

“Did he feel like a royal Prince?”

He removed it’s hide

Using a Swiss army knife

Preserved the head for taxidermy

Mounted it on wall like a proud trophy

He never taught me to shoot but I learned it well

My father was an ignorant man

Lived for himself

Looking after his interests

Not someone you’d call a family man

Here I lay on my bed

Panting, sweating, glaring with an empty head

I close my eyes and images appear

Of the times father made me see

How to gut and how to chop

For I killed my master for his sin

Relieving my mother of his brutal reign

I did the task to perfection

Or maybe to my satisfaction

For I killed the man wearing my father’s skin

An actual wolf in sheep’s clothing

I think to myself, he might have realised

The pain he inflicted on us day and night

Abuses he hurled, making punch bags

Out of his own kids

We suffered a fraction of what my mother did

He was a great man outside home’s threshold

Inside he was a monster, 

Roaming free without a leash to hold

In a twisted way he would be proud

For I learned the things

He didn’t teach

I learned something from my old man

And I learned it well

A Call From Home

Standing at the edge of a cliff

Mild breeze blows his hair away

Carrying a familiar smell

Reminder of his past

A silhouette of his mother it casts.

Working her way around the kitchen

Damping her foreahed 

Rolling her skewers

Ah! The redolence of shish kebab

This wind comes directly from father’s farm

Carrying the stench of fertilizer

Working as his sister’s gag alarm

All his hardwork he put through

Reaping those tomatoes and 

Sowing those fruits

Guess how he’ll react upon hearing this news

For all the times they fought

Talking about heartbreaks and failures

Through tough times the support they sought

It was him versus her

But them against the world

No chair he would rest his back on but her back

Is all he wants

Her baby brother’s all grown up

Thinking of taking the next step

There’s something that strikes him

About this wind

It’s not just his past it carries

But the future too, that may vary

Life’s stringed him all along

He burdened it all 

Did his best but not for long 

He takes the next step
His foot touches the firm ground

He walks away a new man

A total 180 turned around

Free of his burden

He takes the next step

Never to look back

He moves ahead 

Towards the streets

As a kid he roamed

Because this breeze is calling him home

SHELL

Sitting on armchair

Lips against my partner

The touch that brings solace

Helping me to keep up with world’s pace

Each drag that goes in

Each ounce of ash that falls

Makes me forget all my sins

People I did wrong

Friends and kins

You can blame me

I know I am weak

For am livin’ life as a freak

Hoping for the future to see

I close my eyes

It’s as dark as it can be

All I can muster is sorrowful sigh

I take the next drag

My life has been nothing but regrets

With each passing day

Bringing me great distress

Shoulder the weight all day through

I don’t complain

It’s everything that I called upon

Everything can be accounted for

Sun lights up the room

Through a crevice

Trying its best to reach every nook

Just like once people did 

Pushing through

Trying to save the kid

Who once lived inside me

The kid’s long gone

So are the people

There’s nothing on the armchair

Just a hollow shell

Just a hollow shell

LOOP

Standing alone in a crowd

With familiar faces all around

Turning their faces 

At a glimpse of mine

Tears rolling down my cheeks

My soul screaming through my eyes

Need someone to extinguish this fire

To fulfill my long awaited desire

Someone to just call my name

Lest the fire won’t be tamed

A tap on my shoulder is all I want

To be remembered, 

In the faceless troupe

With skin on my bones in a droop

Drag my lifeless soul through the day

That’s how my life goes on

Everyday in a loop